Life on the Road – Trucking News Blog

Well isn’t that a fine howdy-do first thing in the morning. Judy B. Dice* seems to have awakened on the wrong side of the bed perhaps. Greg Marino** seems friendly enough. A whole lot of other folks seem to want me as their friend.

I finished my coffee and strawberry cream oatmeal and decided today was the day this truck-less trucker was going to delve deeper into the “mysterious” world of Twitter and Facebook. I have avoided both for, well, since they pretty much became popular with “everyone else.”

Since I’m currently “laid-up” or “laid-off” or whatever, I have to time to go out and make some new friends and learn some new technology. I’ve been remiss about keeping up my role as a first adopter or is it adapter? Whichever, I’m sorry, money is tight right now and switching up to an HTC Incredible is just not possible. Will that stand in the way of my getting new friends or followers? Heck if I know.

Read the rest of this entry »

Tonight I’m at the FJ in Brunswick GA. Spreading rapidly up from Florida, you will see FJ changing over from their familiar “Country Buffet” to Denny’s. If you still enjoy the tasteless, overcooked, greasy crap that FJ has passed off as food to drivers all these years, eat up before almost every FJ gets converted to a Denny’s. And if you’ve never “dined” at a Denny’s, please give it a whirl and trust me, after trying their menu you will yearn for the old FJ offerings. Denny’s is for the RV’er, Q-Tips with those sardine can trailers with 20-year old one gear bikes duct taped on the rear – not truck drivers. Denny’s is not Waffle House (cash only) or Huddle House, both of which are still trucker favorites. As all of us drivers know, real food, with rare exceptions, will soon no longer exist along the interstates of this country.

Remember high school? What it was like in the cafeteria. This group ate over there at that table, another bunch ate by themselves in the back – you get the idea. Well that’s how it is at the FJ these days. Truckers enter from one side and the “civilians” another. And they “merge” quite uncomfortably in the restaurant. Quite honestly, I really don’t want to eat with these people. It’s bad enough I have to “share” the road with them. They should have never done away with separate dining facilities that segregated “professional” drivers from travelers. Have you taken a close look at these people lately? Most of them are really old, cheap, still dress in things made of polyester and do truly annoying things like just stand there at the buffet stirring the mashed potatoes. Why just tonight one of them was actually reading a FJ brochure! Are these people weird or what?

Some of these civilian couples, married forever, need to hold on to your table, almost spilling your ice tea, to maneuver through to get to their table. Many of them wear matching outfits. Some of the men and women are actually dressing in each others clothes. One old guy looked like he was wearing a pair of his wife’s Capri pants aka pedal pushers. Both of them wore beige support knee highs and those “senior” moon shoes you need to mail order from Haband.  This is all just not right and something I just don’t need to see after driving 500 miles. The younger travelers can be even worse with their preppy Izod shorts, Bally sandals and whiny spoiled brats aka children that are allergic to everything and need sippy cups of non fat milk. You just want to throw a bowl of mac and cheese on their heads.

Mix all this with the 6′ 3″ driver in farmers coveralls who can’t fit in a booth, but since the travelers have all the tables, he chooses to sit side saddle – his unusually large butt in the booth but his two tree stump legs hanging out like he’s waiting for a waitress to give him a lap dance. And fat chance that’s going to happen. The FJ restaurant employees know their time is limited. When the conversion to Denny’s happens it typically comes without notice and they will be terminated. Denny’s wants cute and young and not so stupid. The FJ food staff is as old, slow and unmotivated as the folks that used to dish out the string beans at Morrison’s cafeteria. The last FJ I ate at that was a Denny’s, Sue-zee or Ju-dee was my waitress and she was just sooo excited to serve me pancakes – she called them flap-jacks. It was just like eating back in high school. Look for a Denny’s coming soon to your local FJ.

or, more specifically,  on the Interstate.

Truck Drivers live on the Interstate.  Amazingly enough many drivers are less well informed (according to questions heard repeatedly on the CB) than you would expect.

Some facts for the Clue-less drivers out there.

Interstate Numbering System

Routes  with two digit odd numbers run  north and south. (I-5 through I-97)

Routes with Two digit even numbers run east and west.(I-4 through I-94)

High Numbers are north and east.

So no, you’re not likely to be on I-5 in Florida, even though I-4 runs right near Disney World, but yes, I-97 ( Maryland)  and I-90(Ohio, New York, Mass)  are in the same general part of the United States.

Routes with three digit numbers denote loops or spurs , we’ll take that up in the advanced class.

Exit Numbering System.

The Federal Highway Administration has mandated that all states use the Milepost numbering system.  Starting at the most westerly or southerly point on the route  with mile post “zero” the subsequent  mileposts numbers are incremented by the mile.  Some states, you all know which ones,  have been slow to switch from the old method.

This means, that if you’re on I-40 in Amarillo and hear a driver ask “How far is it to New Mexico?”, well that qualifies as a “stupid question”.  Look at the miles markers. (hint…somewhere around seventy miles from Amarillo to the New Mexico line) but “How far is it to the Oklahoma Line” ISN’T a stupid question. (no telling how far it might go east….although coincidentally it’s also about seventy miles.) Read the rest of this entry »

Got ya. I’m just kidding. I just wanted your attention. Box drivers are OK, I guess. Again, just kidding. Hey, you know flatbedders, we’re always climbing on top (of loads) and using our arms, legs and toys, I mean tools – to tarp and secure, of course. Watch it VGrumpy. There are impressionable minds reading this. There are? Who knows.

ANYWAY. I love – love – but that’s not exactly what I want to talk about. Let’s talk about country music. Yup, I said country music. A new topic for ‘ole VGrumpy. Do you know who the man in the photo is? If you do, you’re a fan, if not, that’s OK. More about him later.

Do you enjoy country music? Most truckers certainly do.  Nascar, country music, fried chicken and beer – right? Personally it depends on my mood. I also love Sinatra and the standards. A little Elvis sometimes. Maybe some 50′s stuff. Chicago, the Beatles and others on occasion. The Eagles and Bon Jovi. But recently I’ve been “hooked” on country music via the “Highway”,  Sirius Satellite channel 60. I’m sure there’s an XM equivalent. 

I’m still kind of turned off by the whiny bouncing fiddley ”my dog done got run over and my girlfriend wants to drive my pickup to WalMart” kind of nonsense. But have you heard the song by Jamie O’ Neil? “Shiver, tremble, I never – no I never once felt so00 (my emphasis) much – it shakes me – how you take me – deeper than I’ve ever been – it’s to the core – under my skin – I shiver – I’m overwhelmed – you smile I melt – and somewhere inside, oh baby, I.”  Holy moly!

How about her other hit song (Feel like a Woman) –  Baby, lay me down on our bed – touch my body like only you can – kiss me softly & take away my breath – slow it down and make it real – cause tonight I want to feel – like a woman. For the guys out there, can I get a “rebel” yell. Come on, nobody’s look’n. “Saaa-looood.” Thanks.

This song is sizzlin hot! And it ain’t Brooks & Dunn or George Strait, for darn toot’n sure.  I almost drove off the interstate when I first heard it. If this is “country”, well I’m stick’n around a while to listen to more.  It is a prime example of the second wave of  ”new” country music. Far from Gene Autry and Roy Rogers. Heck – even actor and Academy-Award director Kevin Costner has a touring country band. I heard one song and I had no idea it was him. It was good. I was surprised. As Alan Jackson sang in one of his songs “He’s gone country!” Because of what I call this new “tweek” in country music, I like it better now than ever, whether Costner or Kelly Pickler sings it. It’s sexier and “edgier” and a real nice change from the traditional stuff. And wouldn’t you agree we all need a lot more lov’n, kiss’n and a hold’n this New Year?  Right ladies? Ok, so who is that guy in the photo?

Read the rest of this entry »

This week I actually put a theme to the weekly trivia post; but I didn’t come up with my usual ten. Sorry. I’ve been unusually busy over the last ten days and it’s only going to get worse over the next two weeks. As a matter of fact, I probably won’t be able to write anything at all for the next couple of weeks; I’m going to be far above the Arctic Circle putting in some long days in Barrow, Alaska. I guess that’s fitting ’cause Barrow’s one of those places where the sun comes up on May 10th and doesn’t set again until August 2nd. Anyway, enough of my whining. Let’s get on with the trivia… Read the rest of this entry »

I have always been extremely interested in the origination of words and phrases but, if you’ve read the previous Tuesday Trivia posts; that’s something you might have already noticed. In a post last week I mentioned that I’d include the derivation of the phrase “cut the mustard” in this weeks edition of Tuesday Trivia; and so I will – kind of. But I’ve included 9 other bits of useless information that are a little more cut and dried (yeah, I’ll get around to digging up the story behind that phrase one of these days). Here goes! Read the rest of this entry »

Actually, there’s nothing trivial about the Declaration of Independence which is, arguably, one of the most important and influential documents ever produced; but, since tomorrow’s the day we celebrate Independence day, I thought I’d let you in on a few tidbits of interesting information: Read the rest of this entry »

Robert South once stated that “Speech was given to the ordinary sort of men, whereby to communicate their mind; but to wise men, whereby to conceal it.” I seem to prove daily my lack of wisdom and provide further proof with the following installment of Tuesday Trivia: Read the rest of this entry »

It’s become abundantly clear to many that there’s some kind of glitch in my brain. Useless facts seem to be stored with priority tags while important information is quarantined like spam. Because of that I have the ability to spout trivia at the drop of a hat – which is all well and good but trivia is…well…trivial. People seem to enjoy it, though, so I thought I’d share a bit of trivia with you on a weekly basis. Some might be remotely related to trucking but most of it’ill just be a bunch of obscure, random, and utterly useless stuff. Here goes!

• The word “decimation”, which makes most folks think of total destruction, is actually derived from the Latin word decimare; meaning “the removal or destruction of one-tenth.” A decimated army, for example, was one that had suffered the conquering Roman punishment of decimationem; the killing, chosen by lottery, of one-in-ten.
• Even though Pittsburgh, PA is commonly called “Iron City”; Alabama is the only state housing within its borders all the natural resources needed to make iron and steel.
• 80 percent of the old asphalt pavement removed each year is re-used; making asphalt the most recycled product in America – more than newspaper, aluminum cans or glass.
• The word “loophole” was originally used to describe the slits in castle walls through which defending archers could shoot their arrows at attacking armies.
• After winning the 24 Hours of Le Mans with A. J. Foyt in 1967 Dan Gurney was handed a Magnum of MOËT ET CHANDON and “began spraying at the photographers, drivers, Henry Ford II, Carroll Shelby and their wives.” This act of exuberance “started a tradition that continues in winner’s circles all over the world to this day.”
• The feathers at the back of an arrow, allowing it to fly straight and true, are known as “fletching”. Back in Medieval times an arrow maker was known as a “fletcher”. If you know someone with the last name Fletcher its a good bet that their great-great-great-great-(you get the idea)-great-grandfather was an arrow maker.
• In 1784 then second-lieutenant Henry Shrapnel got the idea to fill a hollowed out cannonball with musket balls and a charge of gunpowder. The “Shrapnel Shell”, as it came to be known, was adopted by the British Army in 1803 and fragmentation from artillery shells has been called “shrapnel” ever since. Then there’s the story of General Joseph Hooker who’s credited with…well…we’ll leave that for another day.
• The lowest point on the Interstate Highway system is on Interstate 8 at the New River near Seeley, California (elev. -52 feet).
• Jerry Van Dyke turned down the title role in “Gilligan’s Island” because he, like Tina Louise, thought the show was stupid. That makes his decision to star in the series “My Mother the Car” entirely inexplicable.
• On December 23rd, 1750, Benjamin Franklin knocked himself unconscious while attempting to electrocute a turkey. I knew you wouldn’t believe me so I provide proof.

Okay, that’s enough for this week. I’ll see if I can think of ten more things for next week.